No doubt that day last week will go down as “Black Wednesday” for all the death’n’misery profiteers out there: the day the US Trade Representative’s office announced its support for a waiver of patent protection for COVID19 vaccines developed by Pfizer, Biontech, Novavax, and Moderna — and Wall Street crapped its pants.

After week after week after week of hell raised about places like India, where they’re dying like flies and can’t get enough vaccine because American corporations, true to form, are hoarding the supply and the IP protection — the US Trade Rep has decided that waiving patent protection on vaccines during a worldwide pandemic might be a pretty good idea after all… and this hasn’t stopped Wall Street from doing the voodoo that it do so well — setting shares of all four of those companies dropping like a rock on Jupiter.

Buddy, can you paradigm?

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From the party that brought you DNC Dog Food, New Blue Money Detergent, Blue Box Chardonnay, and their Premier Donut Assortment now comes — DNC Ramen! Just the thing to blow that big-ass $2000 — uhh, that is, $600 + $1400 — stimulus check that we were supposed to be getting. Never mind that Gropin’ Joe, Jon Ossoff and Raphael Warnock came right out and said in front of god and everybody that their being elected would allow the immediate passage of $2000 per person in Covid’19 relief.

That would be two thousand —count ’em — two triple-zero dollars. Not the measly $600 and the “oh, alright” $1400 after that, which is what Snopes uses to give its master class in triangulation and “meaning of is” asshattery in an attempt to “fact check” what Biden & Bros said right in front of our personal faces. Luckily, we now have fact-checker checkers.

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I’m just going to leave this here…

“it’s crazy to watch all my California and NYC friends scramble for vaccine appointments meanwhile in Texas I get a text from the local hospital every week begging people to sign up for extra doses they have because everyone here is anti vax and so many vials are going to waste”
—abby govindan, @abbygov on Twitter 04.04.2021

“We should also open up special graveyards for anti-vaxxers . . . who die because they didn’t get vaccinated. Every gravestone ‘Thought vaccines were for cucks’.”
—Trotsky of the 21st Century, @LTrotsky21 on Twitter 04.05.2021

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“If we do all this, if we do our part, we do this together, by July Fourth there’s a good chance you, your families and friends will be able to get together in your backyard, or in your neighborhood, and have a cookout and a barbecue and celebrate Independence Day…”
—Joe Biden, 03.11.2021

So, that’s the big-ass far-reaching goal here, huh? A “good chance” we’ll be able to sorta kinda hang out on the Fourth of July. Not that the Fourth Of July has really meant anything at all to me in the past 15, 20 years, but still… that’s the big challenge to the nation?

D’ahh, well. Granted, that speech wasn’t exactly JFK’s “We Choose To Go To The Moon In This Decade” challenge, but sometimes you just have to take what you can get.

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