“In Trump’s orbit” seems to be the favorite phrase of all the “cool kids” in the media right now after his positive COVID-19 test, rapidly gaining ground on the ever-popular “existential threat”. Without even trying, I returned an entire page of search results from newspapers, magazines, media all over the country sporting headlines or ledes with the phrase “in Trump’s orbit”. You could play a drinking game with it on cable news, but you’d end up in the ER.

So, while the media were beating this poor, misbegotten phrase to within an inch of its life, I had to ask — what, exactly, is “in Trump’s orbit”? The answer, of course, was instantly clear — spent rocket stages, dud rocket stages, derelict satellites, tools lost overboard from ISS spacewalks, the odd NRO top-secret payload, drifting fields of orbital collision debris, a Tesla roadster… wait, wut?

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So, aaaanyway… everybody and their cat have been speculating for months about what they think the “October Surprise” will be in this campaign, and wot’tha FUUUUU—

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OK, just so we’re clear on this: if I ask the Democratic Party what plans they have to deal with any of the major issues of this Presidential campaign — or question their previous record on any of these issues — I’m helping Trump, and I’m a Russian asset.

Is that more or less where we’re at, here?

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This past week, in an interview on Axios, Trump had this to say about the 150,000+ deaths from coronavirus this year: “It is what it is”. You actually have to take your hat off to something like that, something so sublimely, elegantly, ferociously tone-deaf — something even worse, in fact, than Biden’s immortal “you ain’t Black”, and that’s saying something.

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