The George II re-selection campaign is kicking off with a bombshell (so to speak) – they’re ditching Dick Cheney for a guy who knows how to use both sides of his face: that long-time Washington insider himself, hanger-out with Don “Rummy” Rumsfeld – Saddam “Saddam” Hussein! The media, of course, is always on the lookout for some meager shred of good news out of Iraq; NBC presented us with a free GOP political ad in the form of their “Saddam Captured Marathon” spanning the entirety of NBC’s Sunday morning blabfest programming.

President Junior may have been abjectly stupid, but once in a while had those rare flashes of brilliance — like using the head of state of an “enemy” nation as his unofficial running mate, just as his old man tried to do in ‘92. Of course, it didn’t hurt that the Donkeycrats — weak-assed and dickless, as usual — ran a phone-in campaign with a nominee that made Lurch (from the “Addams Family”) look positively scintillating by comparison, thereby cementing the Donkeycrats’ reputation for being craven dive artists.

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I’ll never forget the first time I heard George W. Bush, in the ‘00 Presidential Campaign “debates”, describe a vision of a national education policy in which “no child is left behind”. At the time, I didn’t think much of it beyond noting the Bush campaign’s total lack of original ideas in their theft of a slogan from an educational nonprofit’s PSA that appeared on TV in the 1970s — and a Liberal educational nonprofit, at that.

Of course, by the time Iraq War 2.0 kicked off, we’d heard plenty about Bush’s vision for No Child Left Behind, and large numbers of parents could be heard commenting to the effect that if this is what President Chimp has in mind, then they’d prefer that their children be “left behind”. Needless to say, the sickening carnage of the US bombing of Iraq in the first six weeks of the war had given us a whole new meaning for the slogan “No Child Left Behind”.

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A friend of mine noted that it’d been quite some years since I did one of my good old-fashioned blood-spattered antiwar cartoons, so I came roaring back with “Super Service”, and the even more brutal piece here. As I recall, it was about this time that Lisa Beamer, wife of a 9/11 victim, went on a whirlwind promotional victimhood-pimping tour including a stop on the NBC Today Show plugging her book, and — what really sent me over the top, inspiring this cartoon — her attempt to register a trade/service mark on the phrase “Let’s Roll”. Sweet friggin’ Jayzus, I thought, does this goddamn’ woman have any shame at all?

While pretty much everyone I knew in the antiwar activist community was totally down with the message, many found the imagery disturbing (much to my delight). Washington DC media activist Zoe Mitchell wrote:

…the argument he chose to present his argument with disturbs me. It’s violent. It’s bloody. It makes me sick. Unfortunately, it’s dead-on accurate. US soldiers driving SUVs have shot and killed Iraqi civilians. Contrary to the US Media’s imagery, Persian Gulf War 2.0 is violent and bloody. It should make us ALL sick.

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Revisiting the meme that never fails: Blood For Oil. By this time, more and more people in actual positions of influence were “outing” the real reason for the wars in Iraq: to brutalize and intimidate the population while making off with their oil. US Congressman Dennis Kucinich, in a rare ballsy moment, actually came right out and publicly blurted out the truth that sent the pro-war factions into conniptions: this was a war for oil and resources, and had nothing to do with the (non-existent) WMDs or with restoring democracy (the claimed purpose after the WMD claims were debunked). By this time, I’d developed a pretty much foolproof system for determining whether something was true or not: if it was in the Washington Post or on TV, it was a sure bet that it was false, and if somebody said something that sent the mainstream punditocracy and pro-war howlers into a shrieking tizzy, you could be sure that it was true.

My research for this piece consisted of hitting Google for some scans of old gasoline advertising from back in the days when gas-station attendants wore actual uniforms with hats and bowties, and — now I can confess to it — nabbing the title from a favorite old Three Stooges comedy in which the Stooges were running a gas station (”Super Service! Nyuk, nyuk, nyuk, nyuk…”).

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