“With a test like this, success comes from what we learn, and we learned a tremendous amount about the vehicle and ground systems today that will help us improve on future flights of Starship. Thank you to our customers, Cameron County, and the wider community for the continued support and encouragement. And congratulations to the entire Space team on an exciting first flight test of Starship!”
— SpaceX statement 04.20.2023

“Where’s the KABOOM?
There was supposed to be an Earth-shattering KABOOM!”
— Marvin The Martian

So, I was hitting some sativa bud and banging my head on the table the other day trying to shake loose a decent France uprising cartoon, and THIS weirdness fell out. I’d given up on a France cartoon at the moment and was just doing my daily space geekery, reading about the spectacular SpaceX launch failure and the attendant “hah, I MEANT to do that” spin from SpaceX, when I found my train of thought wandering to the Twitter valuation crash and the Paid Blue Check shitshow and was suddenly, like…

…like, yeah; Musk was really laughing off the Twitter valuation and the hot mess about the paid Blue Check accounts that’s been all over the news lately, and then a day or two later another one of his goddamn Starship tests goes sideways on him and the SpaceX PAO flacks are babbling a bunch of balloon juice about how much they learned today, and it was one of those moments of inspiration and serendipity that screamed “quit twisting your panties trying to think of a France cartoon for a moment and jump on THIS shit, man! Here it is!” Like, yeah — crashing and burning, in metaphor and reality.

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Continue reading "A Successful Launch" »

After Elon Musk bought Twitter, declared it a “free speech zone”, started letting all the fascists back in and shutting down the Left, there was some understandable online rioting this week, and the predictable calls from America’s boutique anarchist media to join an exodus to Mastodon. Oh, how I laughed.

So, late last week, Apple and Google finally got off their goddamn duffs and declared that Twitter would be shut out of the Google Play and Apple App stores if the enabling of fascist hate speech and harassment was allowed to continue. Musk, at his very Muskmost, announced that he would develop his own brand of smartphone whose App Shoppe would allow Twitter.

…which basically leaves Gab and Parler in a spot, when you think about it. Now, you don’t have to go to some seedy, fringey fascist social-media site to spew your shit; you can just go to Twitter.

Sometimes these gags draw themselves.

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Continue reading "Elon Musk’s FashFone™ by PhoneX" »

God, I miss Trump already — yeah, I said it, and I’d say it again if I had to. The sonofabitch isn’t even out of office yet, and I already miss him. I miss the breathtaking, aggressive stupidity, the comical blustering, and those tweets. Oh god, yeah, those tweets — every one a solid nugget of pure comedy gold.

I really was hoping for another four years of those little classics, but no luck. Instead, we’re in for four years of banal, empty, platitudinous bilge — like this little stinkburger, where he takes forever just to tell us that all we’ll likely get for coronavirus relief is another measly-ass $1200 check, and that otherwise we can go fuck ourselves. Christ, it looks like something off an old 1970s cat poster.

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Continue reading "Hang In There, Baby!" »

Hey now, kids — time for a fresh piece of background art for all those text memes featuring deranged inanities queefed out by our favorite media shitlibs and Democratic Party toadies. Here’s another one of my “deranged donkeys”, ideal for immortalizing those priceless golden turds from Twitter.

Above, you can see a “serving suggestion”, with a recent Tweet shat out by none other than Rep. Ilhan Omar, member of every Liberal’s favorite girl group, The Squad™.

The NRA just ran an attack ad claiming I was coming for everyone’s guns. They forgot to mention that they came for our democracy — on behalf of Russia.

It’s time to take down this dangerous organization once and for all. https://t.co/95dphbpZ34

— Ilhan Omar (@IlhanMN) September 27, 2019

For the text, I recommend the Gotham family — a nice, elegant modern sans serif face, as used in Democratic Party print materials and other “branding”.

You can download a blank template in two resolutions:

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14×14 inch 150dpi color .jpg, 664kb

Continue reading "Raving Donkey no.5, New Text Meme Background Art" »