For a few weeks or so earlier this year, MSNBC was running a network promo with this clip of Hillary Clinton speaking, and it had to be the nastiest sounding stuff I’d heard her spew out in years. Hillary’s voice sounded raspy, raw, shrieking like a pissed-off junior high school principal, a voice that could cut glass. You could tell she was trying to sound all forceful and dynamic and Presidential n’shit, but instead all I could think of was the Wicked Witch Of The West. With that raspy shrieky voice, all Hillary needed was a big pointy hat and a broom.

No doubt buttloads of old-skool 1970s feminist language cops will get on my case for comparing Hillary to the WWotW, but, hey… if the shoe fits, strap that motherfucker on.

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Continue reading "#WitchHillary" »

The consensus over here on the Left is that there is a danger to the Occupy Movement far greater than any amount of pepper spray, mace, tear gas or blunt force trauma that could be dished out by various metropolitan police departments, or any amount of buffoonish insults crapped out by Fox News — and that is the danger of being co-opted by the Democratic Party in the form of its various front groups. On the upside, though, this generation of dissidents seems less likely to fall for Democratic Party snake oil, unlike their older comrades who came out of Seattle/WTO, “A16″, and the early ’00s peace movement.

The Democrats’ co-optation attempts are especially galling in the context of the latest news of the Obama re-election campaign fundraising efforts. They’re continuing the pace set during the ‘08 campaign, when the Democrats first surged ahead of the GOP in the amount of campaign cash coming from Wall Street and the banksters.

Not only that, but it’s right out in the open, butt-assed naked, reported on the front page of this past Thursday’s Washington Post. The real “money shot” comes eight paragraphs deep:

Obama’s ties to Wall Street donors could complicate Democratic plans to paint Republicans as puppets of the financial industry, particularly in light of the Occupy Wall Street protests that have gone global over the past week.

“Could complicate Democratic plans”? No shit, Sherlock.

Of course, this inconvenient truth won’t stop the likes of Michael Moore, the AFL-CIO, MoveOn and the Progressive Democrats Of America from trying to weasel their way in and divert the movement’s energy down the Democratic Electoral Black Hole anyway, because that’s just the way they are — exploitive, manipulative, parasitic, amoral.

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Come join the winner of the 2009 Nobel “Iron Chef” Prize on a culinary review of three years of the Hope’n'Change Administration. Bon Appetit!

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Outside spread, 664kb

Assembly instructions:
1. Print two-sided on 11×17 “full-bleed” color printer.
2. Fold in thirds so that the panel with the old Metro car and the title “Chef Barack’s Famous Democratic Diner” shows as the front cover.
3. Et voila!

Continue reading "Chef Barack’s Democratic Diner" »

Interesting how, whenever you look at the news, it’s the Democratic Party that’s bitching the loudest about the influence of big money in politics — even as Barack Obama’s latest re-election fundraising efforts set all-time records, with $86 million raised in the second quarter of this year alone. In fact, Obama’s campaign manager, Jim Messina, reports that the Obamabots are “back, they’re energized” — although his Wall Street masters don’t seem quite as energized as last time. They’re apparently still feeling all butthurt from Obama calling them “fat cats”.

Word has it that the Obama campaign could end up raising at least a billion dollars before the campaign is over. That’s right, ONE BILLION DOLLARS. Who the hell ever thought that one day someone would spend a billion dollars to have himself elected President? No wonder hardly anybody bothers to vote in this country anymore.

ONE BILLION GODDAMN’ DOLLARS. Jesus Christ.

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Special thanks to my Twitter comrade @KenBias for suggesting this gag line in a tweet he posted the other day.

Continue reading "It’s Always the GOP’s Fault" »