Welcome once again, folks, to the latest episode of Russiagate Nothingburger! According to the venerable CNN and Washington Post, a billion-dollar plus major Presidential election campaign was basically blown over by 13 people with a bunch of weak, dank-ass memes.

Needless to say, this mess was revealed to a be big, hot, sloppy bucket of nothing in record time — the total cost of the dank-ass meme campaign turned out to have been about $500k (David Brock’s “Correct The Record” spent millions to troll and harass Leftists and Sanders supporters), the dank-ass memes in question had a reach of about 1%, most of the dankness wasn’t even seen until after the “election”, and the indictment contained no evidence of the “election” being affected in any way regardless.

Still, it’s really nice of CNN to take a break from shouting the same lies over and over until it sounds like the truth in order to run a promo warning viewers about people who shout the same lies over and over until it sounds like the truth.

Jeezus, man; the Democrats must be getting pretty goddamn bored with all that winning, huh?

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Well, here it is, the morning after, and maa-aaan, did the Democrats and US Media get pants-pissing blackout drunk on Russiagate Bombshells this year. They’re sure paying for it now, though, huh? The smoking guns turned out to be shooting blanks, the bombshells were duds, the Mueller investigation’s turning out to be a double nothingburger with extra cheese, their bargain-basement neo-McCarthyite smear attempts against the Left are getting laughed out of the place, and their Great Alabama Hope has already turned on them. It’s hangover time.

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It sure has been a real shitburner of a month for U.S. corporate media, hasn’t it? Aside from other notable debacles last week, the top honors went to CNN for their spectacular self-own involving the wrong date on an email in a Wikileaks trove in its “bombshell” Russiagate report which cited multiple sources — unnamed, of course. Once the correct date on the email was revealed, CNN’s “bombshell” — like pretty much all U.S. media Russiagate “bombshells” — turned out to be a big, empty dry fart.

But wait, there’s more! After that whole hot mess collapsed, David Frum, senior editor of The Atlantic, added to the hilarity by going on CNN, looking the whole country straight in the eye, and telling us that “The mistakes are precisely the reason people should trust the media.” Ohhhh, yeeeaaahhh. Keep fucking that chicken, Dave.

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So, Liberals are telling us that the media who lied to us since forever are the friends of the People now, and so are the CIA.

OK, whatever, Sparky.

Aaaaaaaa-aand, that’s all I’ve got for you on this hot mess right now, folks.

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