The recent Teabaggers’ Shindig over at Senate Park(viewable above) has certainly left me inspired, to say the least. Never did I hear a gang of astroturfers yell more loudly about not being astroturfers even as they were funded by big, fat rightist PACs run by characters like Tom DeLay and Dick Armey, and never did I hear more yelling from a group about how they aren’t about Left or Right, even while they never missed an opportunity to slag the Left — or even on ordinary Liberals, for that matter — as the lot it was my fortune to cover this past Fourth Of July.

Even more hilarious was their total ignorance of the causes and effects of events that happened before January 20, 2009 — forgetting, for instance, that the current corporate bailout fiasco was pushed by George W. Bush. Listening to the howls from the stage and checking out the composition of the crowd, it was as if the single reaction from the Teabagger Massmind boiled down to “OMFG, the President is a N1GG3R!” — like the old-timer in Mel Brooks’ Blazing Saddles, hollering from the top of the church steeple, “Here comes the new sheriff, and he’s a big…” …and it sure as hell didn’t help any as their event was organized and staged by members of a well-known White Power band, Pokerface.

So, considering all this, I thought to myself, “Self, it’s time you did a poster that announces the imminent arrival of the National Teabaggers’ Convention coming to town on the 12th of September, and maybe inspire some of the local anarchists and antifascists to organize a little welcoming committee.” So, I did.

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Organic cotton t-shirt at cafepress.com, $17.99

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So, it seems a bunch of yahoos in various state and county legislatures are bound and determined to rid the place of “illegal” immigrants — “illegal”, that is, in the sense of legality randomly pulled out of some racist politician’s ass about a century or so ago. Of course, “illegal immigration” probably ranks right up there with “intellectual property” on the all-time list of concepts totally pulled out of the asses of politicians.

So, Fine. Just fine. Go ahead, make life so miserable for them that they leave. Hell, why not just deport ’em while you’re at it, if it’ll make you feel better…?

Great. They’re gone. Congratulations. So, who’s going to build your houses and fix your streets? Who’s going to clean your office building at night? Who’s going to do your landscaping work? Who’s going to be your nanny — especially at the wages they’re paid for these jobs, and considering the crap they have to put up with from employers. Most of your average Americans sure wouldn’t take those jobs because of that; either that, or — more likely — they’re all on their sofas waiting for their phones to ring with an offer to be Donald Trump’s Apprentice, or perhaps keeping their options flexible in case that lucrative position as an American Idol Winner comes open.

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Is it just me, or did Secretary Of Snake Condolee-ee-ee-eezza Rice make one of her weirdest statements ever last weekend — even weirder than that NBC “Today” interview where she said “freedom is on the march” about half a dozen times? Oh, and I love the part where she says that “We’re going through a very violent time.” “WE”? What do you mean “we”, white woman?

All in all, though, quite a bout of birth pangs, there; shame it couldn’t have been a more quiet, serene and peaceful birthing experience, like Katie Holmes and Tom Cruise’s baby.

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Finally, a Plan For Victory! Oh, sure, the GOP may not have any real plan — and the Democrats may be even worse — but at least the Bushites have the good sense to put up big signs all around the stage reading “Plan For Victory” whenever President Chimp gives a speech. All the Democrats have is Howard The Duck, living in a party he never made.

Seriously, the Bush Regime flacks must have assumed Americans are even stupider than they actually are to serve up that old Reagan-era bromide “Stay The Course” when, in fact, there were a goodly number of us who remember that load of bullshit from back when it was still fresh and steaming. The war in Iraq is shaping up to be a Fail even more epic than Vietnam, and all President Chimp can think of is to say “Stay The Course”. What was that old Pete Seeger song… “waist-deep in the Big Muddy, and the big fool says…”

In 1989, one Dr. Francis Fukuyama penned what had to be one of the most conceited loads of triumphalist blathering ever, The End Of History, in which he claims that the fall of the USSR and its satellite regimes in Eastern Europe heralded the end of the struggle between Good and Evil (aka Capitalism and Socialism, or the absurdly distorted, simplistic media images thereof). What I found especially laughable was Fukuyama’s treatment of the USA as a state that was somehow immune to collapse and above it all, the “winner” of the aforementioned struggle when, in fact, even as US politicians and pro-capitalist idealogues celebrated the victory of “freedom”, the first rumblings of the collapse of the USA could be heard in the form of NAFTA and George I’s initiation of renewed imperialist adventurism in Panama, Iraq, and Somalia.

The end of history? No, sorry, Dr. Fukuyama, what you heard in ’89 was just the first shoe dropping. Seriously, Dr. F, didn’t you realize that if a regime the size of the USSR could end up as historical roadkill, it could just as easily happen to the USA? Jeezus, what is it with these goddamn’ Harvard jerks?

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