Hey, there, US news media consumers! Interested in finding out what else is going on in the world besides the government shutdown? Bwah ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha hah, tough shit. Curious about what’s up in Greece, the Sudan, or Palestine? Too goddamn’ bad, all they’ve got for you is government shutdown news. Like it or lump it, chumps.

For the past day or two, pretty much every US “news” network has been nothing but wall-to-wall government shutdown babble. MSDNC… uhh, MSNBC has been the worst of the lot, with continuous Obamacare pimping overlaid with 24/7 government shutdown hysterics, taking a break only to allow one of their resident windbags, Chris “Baby Eater” Matthews, to plug his new book about his days as a flunkie for Tip O’Neill — at one point, being interviewed by his wife, f’crissake.

All I can say is, thank Allah for Al Jazeera.

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Now, I didn’t actually watch Obama’s Syria speech last Tuesday — the very sound of his soulless, pompous, officious delivery gives me a Hot Dog Burp Of Disgust — but from all accounts, the whole thing basically boiled down to “Aww, FUUUUUUUUU–“

What really gives me a giggle, though, is all the talk from Obummer and his mob about a “red line”. After all, how long has that whole brouhaha been going on over there — two years or so? Then, after sitting around and pretty much ignoring it, President Sparkle Pony gets a bug up his ass and decides we — “we” being the US State and corporate elites — need to “do something”? Christ, that’s rich.

And whose idea was it to start slinging around the expression “red line”, anyway? That’s got to be one of the stupidest expressions to come from inside the Beltway since “reset button”. You know the Washington insiders and punditocracy are really scraping the bottom of the barrel when they start picking up on a phrase coined by Israeli PM Benjamin Netanyahu in that third-grade show’n’tell he put on at the UN last year.

For me, that’s a sure sign that the elites have completely jumped the shark.

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“White House: Obama Can Go It Alone On Syria”, was the front page headline in last Friday’s Washington Post, as our mass-murdering Nobel Peace Laureate President tried to put on his brave face after the Brits bailed on him, and our own Congresscritters’ clamor for debate grew louder. So, President Sparkle Pony wants to blow off Congress, and the Constitution, and the War Powers Act again, huh? Where have we heard that before, hmmm? Based on what we saw in Iraq and Afghanistan, this can only mean one thing — it’s time to heat up the Jiffy-Pop.

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If you’re like me, you’ve had it up to your ears with Liberal hack pundits comparing Barack Obama to Martin Luther King this past week. Still, when you stop to consider: King had a dream, and Obama has a “kill list” — both pretty high aspirations, so in that sense, yes, they are similar.

If that isn’t bad enough, it seems as if the media were packed to the gills this week with every opportunist Liberal politician who can get near a TV camera trying to tell us what King would’ve thought were he alive today. What really gave me a Hot Dog Burp Of Disgust was Obama himself trying to tell us that King would’ve supported Obamacare. Yes, that’s right — President Drone Strike looked us all right in the eye and said that Martin Luther King would’ve supported a big, fat pork barrel for healthcare and pharmaceutical corporations, a massive sweetheart deal forcing us all to pay a tithe to the insurance industry. I know the President Of The Largest Purveyor Of Violence has been cranking up the Obamacare hard-sell these days, but that’s really jumping the shark.

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Tuscon Citizen, 08.28.13: Obama says speaking in King’s shadow like “following Jesus”

London Daily Mail, 08.14.11: Obama compares self to Martin Luther King at $36k-a-head Democratic Party fundraiser

The Politico, 08.27.13: Obama says King would’ve liked Obamacare

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