So, after all the thrashing and banging and cheap theater, the next one-time stimulus check will be a whopping-ass means-tested $600. For all the people who are sick and dying of COVID19, who are about to lose their jobs and homes, SIX HUNDRED DAMN DOLLARS.

Mind you, they practically broke their goddamn necks to approve a $740bn war budget, but for everybody out here sick, dying, unemployed, homeless…? SIX HUNDRED DAMN DOLLARS.

Luckily, we all have plenty of “understanding” to pay for our rent, groceries, utilities and COVID19 shots.

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Continue reading "Merry Christmas!" »

God, I miss Trump already — yeah, I said it, and I’d say it again if I had to. The sonofabitch isn’t even out of office yet, and I already miss him. I miss the breathtaking, aggressive stupidity, the comical blustering, and those tweets. Oh god, yeah, those tweets — every one a solid nugget of pure comedy gold.

I really was hoping for another four years of those little classics, but no luck. Instead, we’re in for four years of banal, empty, platitudinous bilge — like this little stinkburger, where he takes forever just to tell us that all we’ll likely get for coronavirus relief is another measly-ass $1200 check, and that otherwise we can go fuck ourselves. Christ, it looks like something off an old 1970s cat poster.

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OK, just so we’re clear on this: if I ask the Democratic Party what plans they have to deal with any of the major issues of this Presidential campaign — or question their previous record on any of these issues — I’m helping Trump, and I’m a Russian asset.

Is that more or less where we’re at, here?

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Here in Washington, DC, we’re in Phase II of Pretending It’s All Over And Everything’s OK — that is, “reopening the economy”. Right about now, some restaurants are re-opening for socially-distanced dine-in — meaning, of course, lots of waitstaff and bartenders working for crap wages plus tips, many threatened with firing, desperately trying to avoid infection by getting themselves up like dentists in order to serve maskless, feckless, blissfully ignorant bougie America.

Yet another one inspired by this classic tweet from Benjamin Dixon:

Bruh, if your waiter looks like this, that means you need to take your bourgeoisie ass home and learn to cook until this thing is over pic.twitter.com/rpcpi5inh6

— Benjamin Dixon (@BenjaminPDixon) July 1, 2020

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Continue reading "Covid Brunch" »